NAT: The New Olympic Sport: BreakStrata – where Strata Management meets Breakdancing

This essay exploring the ever increasing flexibility required in a strata manager’s day was written by Rose McCormick, Chambers Franklyn.

“BreakStrata”, where spreadsheets meet spins, and property disputes are resolved with a backflip. This new Olympic sport is all about the competition of strata management combined with breakdancing! This is the future of the Olympics, where speed, strength, and endurance take a backseat to the true test of human capability: managing a strata complex! We’ll witness the world’s finest competitive strata managers, or “strataletes” tackling the most intensive and mind-bending challenge ever devised by humankind, strata management.

The BreakStrata Birth

It all started when the International Olympic Committee (IOC) decided that it was time strata management played out as an Olympic sport with an exciting twist; add the artistic approach of breakdancing. With breakdancing already in the mix at the Paris 2024 Olympics, the IOC figured this could be a game changer in the world of strata. After all, if people can compete for medals by spinning on their heads, why not combine this with organising an AGM that doesn’t end in a riot? Hence, the birth of the BreakStrata Olympic Games. Strata managers would be equipped with a “boombox”, just like the 1980s, a time not just for mullets and blue eyeshadow!

The Opening Ceremony: Parading the Policies and Bylaws

At the opening ceremony, imagine the excitement as the best and brightest strata managers from around the world parade into the stadium, not just with country flags, but with rolled-up copies of their most recent AGM minutes. They march with pride, each representing their own unique brand of conflict resolution and management prowess.

As the competitors march into the stadium, the strataletes perform breakdancing moves. This is coupled with the announcer captivating the crowd with tales of their greatest victories such as negotiating a peace deal over parking spots and passing a budget that everyone miraculously agrees on. The crowd, primarily made up of owners and residents from various strata properties, would cheer wildly, throwing copies of previous AGM minutes into the air like confetti.

Event 1: The Annual General Meeting (AGM) Arena

Let’s start with the first event, the “AGM Arena,” and take what is often considered the most tedious aspect of strata management, the Annual General Meeting, turning it into a high- stakes dance battle. Here, strataletes must guide a room full of restless and disgruntled residents through the agenda, handle disputes about bylaws, pet policies, and maintain order, all while breakdancing to a pulsating beat.

Imagine a stratalete beginning with a “Top Rock” (Dojo, 2024), such as the hip twist, as they outline the year’s financial statements, smoothly transitioning into a “Six-Step” while fielding questions about expenditure figures. With escalating tension in the room over a controversial bylaw amendment, the stratalete throws in a “Windmill” (Frague Moser-Kindler, n.d.) to symbolise a change in direction. Judges will score on the ability to multitask, and the creative integration of dance moves that effectively diffuse conflicts and keep the meeting on track.

Extra points are awarded for innovative moves that demonstrate complex management skills. For example, a well-timed “Headspin” (Dojo, 2024) while explaining a rise in insurance premiums, or a series of “Flares” (Carr, 2013) to energise a weary crowd during a lengthy vote count. But beware, the risk of losing points can be just as quick as earning them. If a resident stages a walkout or the meeting drags on too long, points will be deducted faster than you can say “proxy vote.”

Event 2: “The Emergency Response Relay”

The “Emergency Response Relay” is where strataletes are faced with a simulated building crisis, such as a burst pipe or a fire alarm, while breakdancing their way to a solution. This event is all about quick thinking, agility, and improvisation.

Competitors are given a set of tools and must solve the problem while executing a series of dance moves that keep the crowd entertained. One stratalete might perform a “Backspin” (Frague Moser-Kindler, n.d.) while dodging a simulated water leak, then transition into a “Windmill” (Dojo, 2024) when deciding to call the fire contractor for the fire alarm. The more complex and fluid the dance moves, and the faster the crisis is resolved, the higher the points.

Judges score based on speed, effectiveness, and the number of dance moves integrated into the response strategy, with extra points for maintaining composure and rhythm, and keeping a steady beat while reassuring a group of panicked residents.

Event 3: “The Pet Policy High Jump”

The issue of pets in a strata complex has always been controversial. In the Pet Policy High Jump, strataletes must navigate a dizzying array of bylaws, irritating complaints, and pleas from animal lovers who insist that little Henny Penny the chicken is, in fact, an emotional therapy animal. The bar rises higher with each round, challenging competitors to clear increasingly absurd demands, such as the infamous cat that sings in the night! The stratalete seamlessly transitions from a “Backspin” to a “Turtle Freeze” (Frague Moser-Kindler, n.d.) while placating the pet complaints.

Extra points are awarded if you can craft a policy that satisfies everyone but is so convoluted that no one actually understands it, thereby delaying the inevitable complaints until the next AGM.

Event 4: The Budget Balance Beam

The “Budget Balance Beam” is a competition that requires strataletes to navigate the thin line between fiscal responsibility and resident satisfaction. Strataletes must present a budget that covers essential maintenance and repairs while keeping fees low and avoiding the dreaded special assessments that can spark agitation among residents.

The beam itself symbolises the delicate balance strata managers must maintain, where one tiny slip can lead to financial disaster. There is the pressure to keep costs down, which can lead to deferred maintenance and deteriorating property conditions, or there is the need to ensure the insurance premium can be paid, driving fees up, without the need to utilise premium funding. The strataletes combine these discussions with a flawless “Headspin” or a “Downrock” (Carr, 2013) symbolising the dreaded increase in levies.

Conclusion: A New Era of Olympic Glory

BreakStrata has arrived. No longer confined to boardrooms, strata managers are now leaping, spinning, and popping their way into the spotlight. This new sport celebrates the hidden talents of those who manage our communities, revealing the grace, skill, and creativity required to balance budgets, mediate conflicts, and keep the peace, all while keeping to the beat.

So, give a strata manager a bow of respect and a standing ovation. They all deserve a gold medal, and maybe a nice vacation. Just don’t forget to leave the Wi-Fi off!

Rose McCormick Chambers Franklyn Strata Management E: andrew@chambersfranklyn.com.au P: 08 9200 4200

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